This Is How It Is

How are you?"
"Well, I can sum it up in three words: unwanted, unnecessary, and unloved"


People casually ask you how you are. Mostly you don't answer, or you just go fine. But every so often, be it whatever the weakness is, and you know it's a weakness, or maybe that little bile that bubbles up in your heart everytime your fate hits you (you know that takes a day off you life at the end, except probably you won't even get there), or maybe it's one of your rare friends and you feel they ought to know -- so you say how you really are.

Now saying how you are really doesn't go over well. Some hack out that uncomfortable laugh, waiting for the punch line. Sensitive women mist up, people you don't know you well treat it as a conversation ending - (how many countless times on TV do they ask the neighbors "I can't believe it. She seemed so happy-normal-typical - I never saw it coming"). You have the sense not to tell the people who would freak, and that's that. Modern life is isolating, and those that are yanking on the chain that pulls the plug, well, we tend to be isolated, or, to repeat those three words of my answer: unwanted, unnecessary, and oh so unloved.